Thankful - Thursday November 8

I'm very thankful for the location the Lord has put me in and the excellent medical facilities nearby.  Being 20 minutes from UIHC has been a GODSEND during Morgan's leukemia treatments, as well as with managing Will's arthritis!

Thankful - Wednesday November 7

I'm thankful for a pillow and a comfortable bed to rest after ONE OF THOSE DAYS!

Thankful - Tuesday November 6

I'm really thankful that this election will be over tonight.  I have to say I'm tired of all of the phone calls during dinner, the TV ads and wasted money on bulk mailings to our home.  With that said, I'm still grateful for this country and for the chance we all have to voice our choice.

New Family Picture

Through our journey with Morgan's illness, we've become acquainted with a wonderful photographer here in eastern Iowa.  She has taken some photos of Morgan for the upcoming Man & Woman of the Year campaign for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society's yearly fundraiser.  Morgan will be the 2013 Girl of the Year.  Below are some of the photos she took of Morgan:

We also had her shoot some family photos as well and the photo below is the first sneak peek we have but I can't WAIT to see the rest!

Thankful - Monday November 5

I'm thankful for the right to vote. I'm thankful for this country and that my voice (quiet as it may be) can be heard.

Thankful - Sunday November 4

I'm thankful for the joy AND the pain in my life. Thankful for the growth of my faith and the guiding hand of my Father in heaven. Always. I am never alone.

Thankful - Saturday November 3

I'm thankful for my extended family. My in-laws who love me as their own and are so giving and helpful. My incredible grandparents who have always been there for me and are such an example of commitment to family and each other. My cousins who I've shared both good times and bad. I have such fond memories of our times together. I love each of you! 

Thankful - Friday November 2

I'm thankful for my family I was given at birth.  For my mom who gave up her life for several months this spring and summer to help us care for Morgan and so diligently attends nearly all of her appointments with me. She loves us and her grandchildren well and we are all blessed by that.   For my sister who I can laugh and cry with. With her I have someone to remember the past - the good and the bad and the funny, too ;). She also keeps giving me babies to love on without having to be pregnant! :)   For my loving Daddy who would have just turned 70.  For the 18 years he was in my life here on earth he loved me unconditionally and taught me to follow God.  I miss him every day and give great thanks that I will see him again.

Morgan's Journey

Morgan has a carepage that I'm using to document her journey: www.carepages.com/carepages/MorganClaire

Thankful - Thursday November 1

I'm thankful for the family I have created.  For my husband who loves me unconditionally and far better than I deserve. For my growing-way-too-quickly, strong and sweet son Will who made me a mommy.  For my cancer butt-kicking warrior Morgan. She is the strongest person I know. To wake up with them each day is a gift.

A long time

I can't believe my last post was almost a year ago.  I've continued reading blogs, doing a lot of journaling on my own and doing a lot of other things in the last year.  As I look back at the last few years it feels like something HUGE and LIFE-CHANGING has happened each year.  2007 was precious Morgan, 2008 was my divorce, 2009 was learning a new reality and learning to love again, 2010 was the year I married my incredible husband, 2011 was marked by the loss of my beloved Auntie Les.  That brings me to 2012 which will be marked in my memory as the year was that my sweet daughter was diagnosed with leukemia.  Morgan has ALL (Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia).  It is the most common form of cancer in children and praise God, the most treatable. It's been a wild ride since her diagnosis on March 29.  7 months of fear, tears, joy, blessings and pain all rolled into one.  She's ok.  I have faith that she WILL be ok.  She has approximately 2 more years of treatment in front of her but she will beat this and it will be part of the story of who she is.   It has been a journey this year to truly hand over my daughter to the God who created her.  Who loves her more than I do. It's showing me that I'm really not in control of anything - something my head has told me for years but my heart ignores whenever possible.

We've had lots of other things going on as well.  We took a quick vacation a few weeks before Morgan's diagnosis, Will played baseball in the midst of our crazy spring and tackle football this fall, Eric had weight loss surgery and has lost over 90 lbs (and looks INCREDIBLE), I switched jobs and Morgan started Kindergarten.  Add all of those to weekly clinic appointments and frequent blood draws and we're running around a lot around here. I've frequently seen a list of "Things that cause stress" on the internet or in magazine and let me tell you we've checked the box on far too many in the last few years (both good & bad).

In the midst of all of that I've lost sight of so much. So much of myself, so much of my beautiful family, so much good in the world, so much beauty.  I've been bogged down in the details of the craziness that has taken over. God hasn't let me go, I've let myself go - let myself fall victim to fear, sadness, and anger. I've gained weight.  I've eaten horribly. I've had trouble sleeping or slept far too much. I've been selfish in so many ways. I've forgotten to be thankful, to be grateful for all that I've been given. So many things.  So I'm trying to get back to me.  To being grateful. To being humble. To being content. To loving my family and my life the way the deserve.